Trials

I have had some random thoughts lately. Looking for somewhere to record them and remembered that my blog is where I have been keeping what some would say resembles a journal. So though this is a little more public than I'd like it is my outlet for these thoughts.

Some of the thoughts I have had lately are inspired by personal experience. On Sunday one of the speakers talked about trials. I have heard much over my teenage and young adult years about how trials are necessary for our human experience AND how trials make us stronger AND how in the eternities we will look back on some of our human trials and think that it was such a short moment.

When going through trials I think those thoughts and it helps. It helps put things into perspective. But on the really difficult days, especially lately, on days when I feel that my son will remain "different" his whole life - it doesn't help.

Worries of wondering if Brody will be able to ever talk. Will the day come that I can have a conversation with Brody. If Brody will ever look at me and say "Mommy". If Brody will have friends. Will Brody go to school in a regular classroom. As he grows up can he lead a "normal" life?

With those discouraging thoughts and many more it is difficult for me to gain the perspective to see past my trial or more importantly try to look at the trial and help it make me stronger. On those days I pray more. I try to look for answers in the scriptures. Most days I find comfort. Lately I feel as though comfort is the answer. Comfort from a Heavenly Father telling me that he has comforted many more for much more serious and grievous problems. The comfort we receive from Him is that we are loved and not alone.

Lately I have been very affected by the story of Stephanie Nielson. She is a girl close to my age with a very popular blog. Last year she was in a plane crash that left her very badly burned. Last year she almost died from her injuries. Stephanie's entries on her blog have really helped me realize to face your problems and trials head on and with courage. The other day Stephanie posted the first picture of herself after the crash. I am sure it wasn't easy for her but she did it with the courage of a hero. For anyone who reads her blog you know that Stephanie is first and foremost a mother. I am sure her injuries have kept her from being the mother she was before. Sometimes when I am overwhelmed with dealing with Brody or sadden by his unknown future I think of her and remind myself that I am a mother blessed with the health to take care of my children without limitations.

Trials come to all. As humans it is only our attitude we can control. I need an attitude adjustment. Most importantly I need to do all I can to get Brody the helps he needs and then the rest will be faith in the Lord to take care of the rest.